How does your relationship work when your partner is travelling and you are not?
This is a question which I (Paisley) received a LOT when Lauren went travelling. When your partner is travelling or is about to go travelling, there is a massive stigma and assumption based on you from the beginning. You’ll hear phrases along the lines of ‘well you won’t last long’ and ‘good luck with that’. Well let US both tell you not to listen to that. This post was written in 2016. Now in 2018 I have come back to update you. We are still going strong! If you are meant to be you will the distance and time difference between you will not effect that you understand each others goals and support them.
Our eight tips to survive when your partner is travelling and you are not!
1. Keeping Busy:
It may seem a totally obvious solution but I don’t think, (until you’re in the situation), people realise how essential keeping yourself busy is. Make use of those times when you know you would have been together. Fill your time with good people and good moments to ensure that you’re mind doesn’t keep pondering on how much you miss them.
2. Random Calls:
Be prepared for phone calls at any time of the day (or night in some cases) The time may not be convenient for you, but make it! You never know when your other half may have good signal or WIFI again so make use of those moments that you have together, Don’t let the physical distance put emotional distance between you both.
3.Plan things for you both to look forward too:
They may be travelling now, but that’s not going to be forever. Plan things for you both to look forward to. Whether that be concerts, future dates or even little getaways for yourself. Keep things interesting for the both of you. Also, write bucket lists together and set targets to fulfill them together when you are reunited.
4. Give yourself something to do together, even while they’re away:
Its hard sometimes finding things that you can both do considering at any given time you could be thousands of miles apart. Give yourself challenges or games that you can both do or play together even from afar. I personally highly recommend the game ‘Puzzle 10’. There’s a forfeit hanging on to the top scorer in our case (Good luck Lauren, you’re gonna lose haha).
5. Keep each other updated:
Keeping the lines of communication open is a huge factor in maintaining a good relationship when there’s distance involved. Try keep each other updated on what is going on in your lives, even if it’s the small things that would probably seemed insignificant if they were around all the time.
6. Be cautious of what you say:
In my experience this has only applied to food! When your girlfriend is travelling around Europe in a van on a budget, you be careful about what food you mention you’re having for tea that night. I mentioned a donut once and I think I heard her heart break through the phone. Be considerate of their situation, for your own sake as well as theirs.
7. Keep Some routine if possible-
Keeping a routine can be difficult at the best of times but sometimes even the smallest little things help. From the way you end your phone conversations to silly things you do when you do get to talk. Some stability in what you do with each can be a huge source of comfort.
8. And finally, That time of the month…
So if you or you partner is a woman (Or in our case, the both of you are) then you have to pay particular attention and be aware for that time of the month. We all know when women are due on, emotions are heightened, everything seems that much harder and everyone is that much more sensitive. We have a knack of handling those times these days. Expect those ‘Typical Women’ moments as we like to call them and take them with a pinch of salt. It’s the hormones talking, things will be back to normal in a few days, You still love each other, Its okay, You got this!
If you are looking for tips about how to travel WITH your partner then check out Oneika the Traveller’s post. Personally, I think it is a great read!